The Top Ten Types of WoW Gold Makers

  1. The Opportunist: Willing to adjust strategy based on perceived market needs and predicted trends. Runs around looting bodies while teammates are dying in PVP because, “they just despawn so damned fast.” Known to reprice items in the AH to “more realistic” levels. Will go to the most remote regions in the land to get that one “ultra rare item”… and then sell it. Sells white items on the AH because “people are lazy, man.” His best ‘friends’ are his best customers. Has the Auctioneer add-on installed, but thinks of it more as a religion than a mod. Loathes AH fees and deposits. Can become emotionally unstable when undercut.
  2. The Farmer: Dual gathering specs. Mastered the art of flying in circles. Has routes planned out in advance and is willing to fervently debate the efficiency of these routes with anyone foolish enough to do so. Does very little actual ‘playing’ of the game. Despises other farmers and immediately assumes they are from China. Is known to say things like, “That’s my node,” or “stay out of my zone” and mean it.
  3. The Master Craftsman: Crafting specced, sometimes even dual crafting specced. Can answer questions like, “What mats do I need to craft X?” without even opening her tradeskill window. Bank is filled with crafting materials, even stuff that’s been obsolete for years because “you never know when you’ll need it.”
  4. The Daily Grinder: Money making efforts focus almost exclusively on daily quests. Has extensive opinions on which quests to group together in order to maximize profits from rewards. Thinks it is ridiculous that they can’t be friendly with both the Oracles and the Frenzyheart. Willing to help you with a dungeon, raid or quest after he finishes “just one last daily”. Is partial towards (is partial towards…is partial towards…is partial towards…is partial towards) repetitive game play elements. Thinks the Isle of Quel’Danas was the best content Blizzard ever created.
  5. The Deadbeat: Always broke and always ‘needs’ a new BoE item or enchantment. Willing to pay you next month (with interest) for 1,000 gold today. Says things like “I never borrow money, I really hate to do this…” while hitting you up for another 1,000 gold. Never, ever, repays loans and has maccro’d the phrase, “Oh man, I’m so sorry. I forgot all about that. How about I pay you next week?” Thinks that borrowing from Peter to pay Paul is a legitimate, and often overlooked, system of wealth generation. Wonders why there is not an in-game credit card system.
  6. The Ninja: Ninjas the most profitable loot from runs. Only question he asks on guild applications is how soon he can make withdrawals from the guild bank. Scams other players on his level 1 soon-to-be-deleted alt. Switches servers and/or toon names regularly to protect identity. Believes that if he ninjas something of high value it is the group member’s faults for letting him be the Loot Master. Wonders why everyone is “crying over pixels”. Thinks running an in-game casino is entirely within the ToS…or at least should be.
  7. The Dungeon Master: Solos old school dungeons at least once a day. Knows the strats for most heroic runs. Mumbles things like “Sheep the X” in his sleep. Sells valor bracers whenever possible. Regularly runs both regular and heroic daily instances- jumps with glee when they are the same instance. Thinks the guy that famously lost it [Strong language and NSFW] in the Onyxia raid was acting pretty reasonably. Loathes repair bills, noobs and PUGs. Could run Scarlet Monastary in his sleep, sometimes does.
  8. The Stripper: A female toon willing to dance for tips or gifts. Uses Outfitter or Blizzard’s equipment manager only to switch between clothed and naked modes. Will often say that you look “handsome and strong,” and that she thinks you “have a big sword.” Almost always a lower level to enhance the “please help me, I can’t afford to buy my skills” effect. Begs for run-throughs and boosts, but prefers you just pay for a dance. Is willing to go with you to the tram tunnel for additional fees. Thinks the implementation of Blood Elves was solely so that the Horde could have hotties as well. Uses terms like ‘MUAH’, ‘Rawr’, ‘<3 U’ and is prone to frequent /hugs. Does very little actual playing of the game and has a large fan base of pubescent teen boys. Is almost always a G.I.R.L (Guy in Real Life).
  9. The Mercenary: Provides services such as portals, enchantments, lock boxes opened… for a tip. Known to add those that don’t tip to friends list so that they can forever keep an eye on them and harass them about their cheapness whenever possible. Provides runs for lower levels and alts for gold. Knows the Stockades, Zul’Farrak and Deadmines like the back of his plated fist. Is almost always a melee DPS class. Has the term “Don’t die nub” maccro’d and key bound. Gets paid up front.
  10. The Barterer: Will trade his Titansteel cooldown for a stack of buff food, for an enchanted vellum, for an orb, for a few eternals, for an Abyss Crystal, for a stack of flasks, for an epic BoE item, for a rare non-combat pet, for… Rarely, if ever, actually cashes in. Often too broke for consumables or food, but is willing to pay you Tuesday, for a hamburger today.

🙂 So… which one are you?



Filed under Funny Money, Off Topic, Uncategorized, WoW Market Commentary

22 responses to “The Top Ten Types of WoW Gold Makers

  1. Rob

    Great article. I’m probably #4 nowadays. I ran the icecrown dailies yesterday on my druid for the first time (thus everything was done twice), got about 400g in enchanting mats, vendortrash, and of course quest rewards, for two hours of work. I hate farming and I hate farmers and whoever jacks up prices for leveling crafts to obscene levels.

  2. Nicely done.

    Like Rob, I’m #4. Been living in Icecrown for a while now.

  3. Hardyoyo

    No goblin? Hmm…

  4. Zamboni

    Only one?

  5. shopx3

    I’m most definitely #4. That and every 4 days I make one of the epic JC rings/necks to sell.

  6. Seleynna

    I am definitely # 8 ……..Uhhh i mean 4 and 2

  7. Priceless article! I find myself a bit in 1,2,4.
    And my dear sir, the Isle of Quel’Danas IS the best content Blizzard ever created! No doubt about it!

  8. #1 🙂
    That a mate died while I was removing an enemys badge really happend to me once.

  9. 8.


    Made me a few hundred gold back in the day. lol


  10. Rodrian

    number four with splashes of seven and nine mixed in

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  12. Hola – loved the post. I am #3, which I have openly admitted on my blog. I put a link to this in my latest post because I enjoyed it and thought it would be interesting to my readers as well. Good stuff!!

  13. bldavis59

    i found this because of kaliope’s crafting blog and i hate to say it but im a mix of actually 4 types!

    #3 (check out my response on kaliopes blog for more info)

    #4 (at least with the argent tournament)

    #10 (just ask my guildies, can you say alt gear swapping?)

    and worst of all, #1, for that example too!

  14. jederus

    @ all- I think most of us can agree that many of us are bits and parts of many of the types but there is almost always a dominant trader type. There there are those players that fit one description exactly… you know who you are 🙂

    I, for one, fit many of the descriptions above at one point or another. Well, except for the stripper maybe. But who knows? If it ever started paying you just may see me taking off my armor in front of the AH. 🙂

  15. Nice website of WOW GOLD

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  17. Zlikovac

    The Opportunist , btw love u

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  19. Grymm

    #1 – That’s all WG is there for, is so I can loot corpses. Also Auctioneer is the only add-on that is necessary for gameplay.

    #2 – While not looting corpses in WG, I am generally flying around it looking for nodes. I also know the despicable allies who farm my nodes by name (Boogerit, you are a fail-hunter!)

    #4 – Not a lot, but I do the dailies for the Sons of Hodir every day (Only because I am trying to raise rep to exalted, really. And the fact I farm the earth elementals there about an hour or two a day.)

    #7 – Not every day, but I can walk someone through any pre-BC dungeon over Ventrilo, and I can explain strats for every dungeon boss fight in the game.

    #9 – If I’m not busy, I will run people through instances. I also open locks and give portals, for a price. I laugh at n00bs who want a run through BRD for anything less than 100g, and yes, even though I don’t need it any longer, I do have my Mallet of Zul’Farrak.

    #10 – A little thrown in there, I like to trade items and other services. In addition, my mom has always said that I took after Wimpy too much when I used to watch Popeye 😉 (And it isn’t cause I’m a wimp, either, because although I am a computer nerd, I’m also somewhat athletic and I would have never made it through basic training if I was a wimp…)

  20. queenfox

    I’m: The Farmer But a nice one. XD And the: The Dungeon Master

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